While the sadness of Amy's death surrounds me I cannot
believe my first thoughts of the loss of great musical talent
at age 27. I recap in my mind -Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix,
Jim Morrison (but do not remember Kurt Cobain only because
he was not from my generation-love his work but did not know
the age he died).
I do not see an enormous body of work left behind by Amy.
What I know of her work is that I loved it all. I remember
the gals in my office sequestered in cubicles singing new words
to 'Rehab' as a testimony to work tasks we did not want to accept.
Try it you may have fun, 'They tried to make me............I just said
'No, No, No' -it just may make your day go better.
When Janis, Jimi,Jim & Kurt exited this life the immediate news
by internet was not part of their world. If technology did not give
us such an immediate access into celebrity lives we may have had
Amy amongst us a little while longer.
I for one want to scoop up the remains of her work plus her duet
with Tony Bennett to just know I can leave a little something
for her family she leaves behind.
Amy, I for one will tell anyone who wants me in rehab, 'No, No, No,'
May you now rest in peace and have fun in Rock and Roll Heaven &
no longer be judged for who you are.
As I reach another mile marker in the age
category I have attained part of my 'real
age' goal to make 60 the new 50.
Last summer I started out with the Real
Age test and was right around my regular
chronological age.
My 'Real Age Test' is now 55 and I plan to
hit 50 or lower during this year.
Physically, emotionally and mentally I am
feeling my best age ever. Mainly knowing
that I have made some good and bad decisions
over the years and lived through them with
the grace of God is no small feat.
I can look back on the lives of my son, daughter-in-law
and grandson and see the happiness in my life.
I can share past and present happenings with
a dear friend and know that our experiences
keep our friendship alive and well.
Is 60 the new 50? I plan to make it true.
While my grandson spent the night last night I
realized that sometimes children are not the only
ones who need to be held sometimes at night.
He let me know that if I could just hold him till
he fell asleep then he wouldn't be afraid of the
monsters. Even as adults if we just hold that
special person at night we keep the monsters
away from them. Oh -it's so true!
I am not one to celebrate 'traditional' calendar
holidays like 'Mother's Day' at the Sunday
Brunch with mothers of various degrees of
grey,brown,black & blonde hair coloring shades.
I also don't believe a date on the calendar is the
only time your child or children should remember
their Mom.
Last night into the early Mother's Day hours I was
at a local rock club watching my son's first band
headline a 20th reunion show of thrash metal.
Yeah these various former and some current
rock musicians just screamed it loud and boldly,
'Come get your Mother's Day!' And guess what?
I did and I loved it!
I reminded the guys in my son's former band that
they are now the age I was when I first started
showing up to their shows at that very club over
20 years ago. That was something to mull over!
The rest of the evening was getting to see old fans
of my son's first band plus a few old high school
buddies of the band (yeah they went to grade school
and high school together). I also got to see and spend
time with musicians in my son and daughter-in-law's
current music circle. Club scenes always lend the
time to meet new music fans also.
Until the headliners took stage I almost forgot what
those 'garage band' days were to 3 high school friends.
Then hearing my son on his double base pedals working
his entire drum kit with a disciplined frenzy much different
after years of study and cross country touring than that
young drummer over 20 years ago I realized he became
who he wanted to be. My son wanted to be a professional
drummer -and so he is. As a Mom I get to watch him perfect
his craft -time and time again. Every club show, every concert,
every cd release is Mother's Day for me.
No matter what your taste in music it may be hard to grasp
that musicians are people with families just like you & I even
when their lyrics or musicality is not soothing to the ear.
I spent time talking to lots of Moms last night out with hubbys
or just their girlfriends. I spoke to sons whose Moms are just
the best in their eyes but maybe not into the rock club scene.
So if you ever run across a band who plays, 'The Ballad of Jimi
Hendrix' or 'The Ballad of Jim Morrison' or 'The Ballad of Elvis'
and you have any angst or troubles bothering you just remember
your audience participation line to yell back to the band, 'He's Dead!'
Then smile to yourself and remember you are still living and have
a Happy Mother's Day or Father's Day or Valentine's Day each
day you continue to live.
Thanks to my son for one of the best Mother's Days ever!
If you have a hero it may not be anyone else's hero
Your hero may be a parent, another relative, a teacher,
a mentor, a friend, a co-worker, an activist, etc.
No matter who you consider a hero you will agree why
heroes are the same to everyone
A hero inspires us to be better than we are
A hero makes us believe in the impossible
A hero teaches us to be courageous when we think we can't
A hero keeps us believing that we can be a hero to someone
If we only believe we can do a few things to claim hero
status -it may only be to a small person who looks at
us in love
I'm sure I have heroes who don't claim such status but their
life has proven to be hero status in my eyes
Some heroes to me are older and some are younger
Some of my heroes know who they are and discount the title
Some of my heroes may never know I claim them as such
Those heroes are the ones who others also claim as their hero
Remember when just holding hands was enough
Remember when being held closely was enough
Remember when laughing at each other was enough
Remember when an evening out nowhere special was enough
Remember when not have money but having each other was enough
Remember when late night phone conversations was enough
Remember when an unexpected letter or card was enough
Remember when just being special to someone else was enough
Today it's still enough in some people's eyes
More the rock music fan than the
country fan I am endeared to Trace
Adkins and this song in particular.
'You're Gonna Miss This' and the
chorus: You're gonna miss this,
you're gonna want this back
you're gonna wish these days
hadn't gone by so fast
are so intertwined with many points
of our daily lives.
If we look back to when our children
were babies or each year as they grew
If we look at our community at large
and remind ourselves of the attempt
we made as volunteers to make it better
If we spent time with family & friends
who are no longer here or near to us
If we attempt to bring laughter to those
who are struggling
These and countless others are times
we miss as we travel through our
life's journey.
After just spending nearly a month in
daily conversation with a distant friend
we both commented, 'I'm gonna miss this.'
